How do I Tell Him I Love Him?
by MaxLightwoodLivesOn
Summary: Clary is in love with her best friend who she is slowly growing apart from. Alec also has a problem. He's in love, with a guy, and is still coming to terms with his sexuality. 'I've fallen for someone who can never love me back.' Sorry for the rubbish summary. *Two Shot* Clace and Malec AU/AH
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Hey guys! I had this idea stuck in my head and I know it's a little overdone but I really wanted to write it! This is a CLACE and MALEC two shot**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Mortal Instruments**

**Clary POV**

4 years, 7 months and 10 days. That is how long I've been in love with my best friend.

We've known each other forever, well since we've been born – but that's still 17 years. I've seen him at his worst and he's always been there for me too. I was there for him when we were 10 and his parents were killed, I was there when he was adopted into the Lightwood family, and unfortunately for me, I've been there for every single girl he flirts with, dates, sleeps with and dumps. It's the same cycle every week, sometimes with new girls, and sometimes it's a stupid bimbo who's been through the process too many times to count and is still certain they belong with my best friend.

We've always been Jace and Clary, never Clary and Jace. He will always be the athletic and popular jock, with everyone worshipping him and how he looks like a Greek god, with his golden blonde hair, and honey coloured eyes to match.

And I will forever be known as Clary, the short red headed nerd, with the body of a 14 year old girl and too bright eyes, who is in love with her best friend. I've always been teased for the way I look, not just for the height, hair and body, but especially the freckles and the glasses. I've been called anything and everything, from half pint to midge to Pippi Longstocking to a leprechaun. I've fallen for someone who can never love me back.

Fortunately I've also got two other best friends, Izzy Lightwood and Simon Lewis, who are both aware of my issue with Jace. Unfortunately, they have now admitted their feelings for each other and are so in love, and they aren't really there to hang out with me anymore. If the three of us usually go out, I'm usually a third wheel.

Jace and I have also been drifting farther and farther away now and I don't know why. I'm afraid that he's realised that he could do so much better than me, which is why he never wants to hang out with me, and it breaks my heart, it's not just that though. He's started avoiding me in school now too. So I can't hang out with him, or Izzy and Simon, because those two just suck face all the time now.

But I'm lucky that I found a new friend in Alec Lightwood. Because of all the time I spent going over to the Lightwood's after making plans with either Izzy or Jace, and it resulting them ditching me for dates, I've hung out with Alec and their younger brother Max instead. But it's mostly Alec since Max is usually at a friend's house.

It also helps that Alec is in a situation similar to my own. A few weeks after I started hanging out with him, I opened up and told him about how I'm in love with Jace, and if he had any advice. With that said, he had completely broken down in my arms and told me that he had a similar problem telling me he had fallen for someone who could never love him back. He was gay. He told me how he had found out a few years ago, and didn't know how to tell anybody, for fear of being shunned and bullied, he also said that he told me because after a few weeks of hanging out, he thought of us a close friends, and I told him that I felt the same way. On top of that he had the biggest crush on someone in our year named Magnus Bane.

If there was one word to describe Magnus, it would be ostentatious. You could see him coming from a mile away, and the most openly gay man I had ever had the pleasure of meeting. He would show up to school in neon skinny jeans, sparkly shirts and a pound of glitter in his hair every day. He and Alec were complete opposites, but I could see them a couple, and an extremely cute one at that. Also, I knew for a fact that Magnus was just as smitten with Alec, as Alec was with him. Alec had also asked me for help as he didn't know what to do.

So that's what I am doing now. I had brought Alec to my favourite diner called Taki's, and I knew we wouldn't be disturbed, because as beautiful as the inside is, the outside looked like a place crawling with squatters and druggies. Alec was sitting at a table on his own. I had told him that I had a plan for him to become more confident about his sexuality. But what he didn't know was that I had invited Magnus on a blind date with 'a guy who is trying to become more self-confident, but would need to keep his relationship on the down-low'. Magnus had immediately agreed, saying that he needed to try and get over 'the handsome blue eyed boy'.

Suddenly, the bell tinkled, letting me know that someone had entered, I turned around and saw Magnus.

"He's here," I whispered to Alec, "but don't turn around, I want it to be a surprise for both of you!"

"Ok," Alec replied, I could see his palms becoming sweaty, signalling that he was nervous.

_Calm down, _I mouthed to him, and he gave me a minute nod. I went to the door to greet Magnus and brought him to the table.

"Alec this is Magnus Bane, Mags this is Alexander Lightwood." Both of them stared at me, their jaws haning wide open. "Enjoy!" I laughed and went back out to the chilly New York air, after whispering "Text me when your home I need details!" to Alec.

_5 hours later  
_I'd been sitting at home watching reruns of Doctor Who on my laptop and eating _way_ too much ice cream when my phone pinged with a message from Alec.  
**Omg come over now please I have so much to tell you! – A  
**_Ahh! Ok I'm leaving my house now! Be there in 5 secs – C_

It was useful that I also live next door to the Lightwoods, I pulled on my shoes grabbed a house key, left a note for my mum and Luke – my stepdad – who were at work, and raced out the door.

As promised I arrived outside the Lightwoods front door 5 seconds later and pressed the doorbell. As the door opened I immediately started talking "_Oh my ANGEL, where have you been? It's been 5 hours, where did you go? Did you have fun? Because I hope you-_ JACE!" As I got a good look at who opened the door I realised that it wasn't Alec at all but Jace, my best friend who had ditched me for the popular kids. I stood there not knowing what to say, when he started talking.  
"I assume you're here for Iz, right? ISABELLE! CLARY'S HERE" he yelled, as he let me in. I was about to respond when Izzy came down the stairs and gave me a hug.  
"Oh Clary I'm so glad you're here I have to talk to y-".

"Hang on a second," I cut her off. She stopped talking and looked at me; Jace started staring at me too. "Izzy, I didn't come here to talk to you. I haven't spoken to you in nearly a week." Both of them stared at me until Jace said "Oh then I'm guessing you're here to talk to me and tell me about your undying love for me." I started blushing even though I knew he was just trying to annoy me.

"No," I replied, and for a second I swore a saw his face fall, before it became his 'I don't give a shit' mask. "I'm here for Alec" I said determinedly, and both of their eyes widened and mouths fell open. When it became obvious they weren't going to do anything I called for Alec myself  
"ALEC, ARE YOU THERE?" All of a sudden I heard thundering down the stairs and Alec came down and pulled me up the stairs, leaving his siblings staring after us, and went on to tell me all about his date with Magnus.

**Jace POV **

As I opened the door for Clary, all I could think was: _She's here, I'm going to do this, I'm going to tell her. _But then I heard what she was saying, and realised that she was here for Izzy and not for me. But then when she revealed that she was here for Alec, it was as if my heart had shattered. Once the two of them had disappeared into Alec's room I went into my own room to think.

Clary has always been my rock and now I was losing her and I couldn't bear it. The only reason I had started pushing her away was because of my growing feeling towards her. I couldn't stand it if I lost her because of my silly feelings. I would never deserve someone as beautiful and caring and loving as her. I love everything about her including her flaming red hair and beautiful moss green eyes. I love how she's never going to grow to be more than 5 feet 3, and how there was a light dusting of freckles over her face.

But she deserved to be with someone who made her feel loved and cherished and who could give her the world. I deserved someone who didn't give a shit about anything including me. I never deserved true love.

I'm in love with my best friend and she can never love me back.

**Clary POV**

Alec and I had finished talking about his date with Magnus, and I was now trying to convince him to come out, at least to his siblings, that he was gay. We had been talking about this for a least an hour when he suddenly went "Ok, I'll tell Jace and Izzy." _Yes!_ I thought, _finally_.

"BUT… only if you tell Jace how you really feel and that you're in love with him."

I could tell he was challenging me, absolutely certain that I would never agree. But if this is the only way for him to do it…

"You have yourself a deal."

**A/N CLIFFIE! As I said before this is only a two shot so I will be posting the next part up soon and I PROMISE that it will have CLACE!**

**Please review and tell me what you think!  
P.S Go check out my other story if you haven't already! It's called The Shadowhunters (sorry I couldn't think of a better name :/)**

**MLLO xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Here's the second – and last – part of this two shot! Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Mortal Instruments :(**

_Previously:_

"_Ok, I'll tell Jace and Izzy." Yes! I thought, finally._

"_BUT… only if you tell Jace how you really feel and that you're in love with him."_

_I could tell he was challenging me, absolutely certain that I would never agree. But if this is the only way for him to do it…_

"_You have yourself a deal."_

**Clary POV**

"Wait what?" Alec spluttered, he hadn't expected me to actually take him up on his offer of telling Jace. But if this was the only way for him to come out, at least to his siblings, then I'll do it.

"You heard me," I replied, "I'll tell Jace how I really feel, and you tell him and Izzy that you're dating Magnus."

"B-b-but I, I mean, I was just kidding haha…" he tried to cover up.

"No Alec," I interrupted him, "You go back on this deal, I'll… I'll take your entire Doctor Who box set."

"NO! Fine I'll do it!"

"Brilliant, I'll go and get Izzy and Jace and you go wait in the living room!"

**Jace POV**

Clary had come into my room a couple seconds ago and told me to come down to the living room. As I walked out, I saw Izzy exiting her room as well.

"Do you know what this is about?" She asked me.

"Nope," I replied. We made our way down to the living room, and saw Alec and Clary sitting and whispering to each other, and something snapped inside of me.

_That should be me _I thought _I'm the one who's in love with her_.

As we sat down, the two of them stopped whispering, and Clary said "Izzy, Jace, Alec has something to tell you."

We both turned to Alec, extremely confused, he was bright red and extremely nervous.

"Y-yeah… I'm… I- " he stuttered.

Izzy and I looked at each other, completely puzzled about what was going on.

"Alec," Clary said, "they're not going to mind, you're still Alec. Remember how it goes? Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. They matter, and aren't going to mind."

I'd got even more confused after she said that. But her words seemed to have an effect on Alec, as he calmed down instantly and nodded at her. He took a deep breath, looked at the both of us, and in a clear voice, he said,

"I'm gay. I have a boyfriend named Magnus Bane, we've been on one date and I like him very much, this is the real me and I'm sorry if you have a problem with it, but there is nothing I can do about it."

Izzy and I looked at each other, back at Alec, and then broke out into giant, goofy smiles.

"Finally! You told us," Izzy exclaimed, getting up to give her brother a hug.

"What? You knew?" Alec replied, looking shocked.

"You're our brother Alec, of course we knew. We just wanted you to be the one to tell us," I said.

With a giant smile, Alec turned to Clary and said two words "Your turn."

We then turned to Clary as she cleared her throat and said, "Jace, please can I talk to you for a second."

I nodded and followed her outside to the greenhouse, and she started speaking.

"Alright, I promised Alec I would do this if he came out and told you about Magnus." I silently nodded to her again, not completely sure where this was going.

"Ok, the reason I haven't told you this before is because I was scared that it would damage our friendship, and now, well now, it seems as if there is no friendship to damage." My face fell at those words, but before she could notice, I slipped back into my façade, pretending that she hadn't affected me with those words. I was silently reminding myself why I was pushing her away.

"Here goes nothing," she said. "Don't interrupt me or I'll never be able to finish. Right, ok, I can do this. I promised Alec, that if he did what he just did I would tell you the truth about how I feel about you." I opened my mouth to ask her a question, but I was immediately silenced.

"No," she said, "let me finish. Otherwise I never will. Jace, you're my best friend, but for some reason you've been pushing me away and I don't know why. We haven't spoken to each other in weeks, and it hurts more than it should because… because I'm in love with you Jace."

Wait what? Did I just hear her correctly? I'm pretty sure my eyes have nearly popped out of my head. But before I can reply to her, she starts talking again.

"I've been in love with you for over four years now but I never told you because you were my best friend." I just stood there staring. How was this possible? She returned my feelings and was in love with me too? For 4 years? I couldn't move.

But then she said, "It's fine I know you don't feel the same way. How could you? Look at you and then look at me. I just did this because I promised Alec." She gave me a small smile and started to turn around and walk away. I suddenly came back down from cloud 9, and realised she didn't know. She didn't know that I was in love with her too.

"Clary, wait!" I called out to her. She stopped and turned around looking confused. I ran up to her and said "Exactly Clare, look at you and then look at me. I would never deserve someone as beautiful and caring as you are, which is why I never told you that I'm in love with you too. I'm sorry for pushing you away. It's because I couldn't stand to be around you and act as just your friend, when I felt so much more."

She just stood there staring at me, until I closed the distance between us.

**THE END**

**A/N Sorry if it ended a bit abruptly I tried my best! Thanks for the reviews but can we please try and get a few more? I got over 200 views for this story but only 6 reviews so please review!**

**Also, a reviewer asked me what my other story The Shadowhunters is about, and this is the summary:**

**Hi, I guess I should start by telling you a little bit about myself. Umm where do I start? My father is a raging psychopath trying to kill me... Oh and I work for a secret division of the C.I.A called the Shadowhunters. Clary Fray has the job of protecting the Director of the Shadowhunters' children, while keeping herself alive too. Max is alive. AH/ AU**

**MLLO xx**


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